Reflection is such a key aspect of contemplation and learning. Often when I am looking back on an event or situation I’m mostly just telling myself the story over and over- picking apart details, analyzing, looking for clarity by trying to exact the inflections and scrutinize the sequences. Which on our best of days- when we have the space to welcome the growth pains that can accompany learning, and dive in utilizing the fine-tuned fork of discrimination- can lead to great realization and a deeper understanding of ourselves.
Yet recently, after weeks of this endless loop, I had gotten nowhere- I was wrongly treated and misunderstood and nothing more seemed to come out of the incessant storytelling. Finally, finally, I surrendered the layers of story into my meditation- I got quiet, and slowly loosed my stubborn grip on what I considered my legitimate, rational perspective.
Meditation, a form of silent prayer, is a beneficent mirror, the potential pure reflection. When caught in the noise of mulling over details the surface of our mind is rough, dimpled with the many impressions, with the meaning we have given those impressions strongly embedded. This is, than, asking the mind to do something very tricky indeed- to be actively churning at the same time it is trying to cast back a reliable image. Often, what we need is a movement into stillness, quiet, an intention of release so that the mind can become as clear as glass and the echo of truth can resound from within.
This is the only way I’ve ever been able to successfully free myself from the investment of a sticky story, to no longer identify so strongly with the position I held in that moment. In the pure reflection of the inner mirror it is no longer about how you got there or how you are going to get out of there, why you were put there or not put there. In the mirror of deep meditation you see the ‘YOU’ that can’t be contained in any one position and so is joyfully willing to take whatever position brings learning to the surface.